Nothing big lately, just a steady increase of mannishness, in the standard uberfem way. The neckbeard part of my beard--that is, the part that that would look especially terrible if I neglected it--is coming in with terrific force. Otherwise, still fairly babyfaced. So, unless I want to look like a teenage metalhead virgin, shaving it is.
My voice is getting pretty relatively deep, I think. It's hard for me to gauge sometimes. I'm going to start recording the new Pegasissy album this week, so I think I'll get a better sense of where my voice is when I hear it compared to it's former version. Needless to say, I can no longer sing the Roy Orbison song "Crying" like I used to.
I still am not actively passing too much, I think. Yesterday a giant Rastafarian street person stopped by CALC insisting that he was a member and stating that he was looking for lost relatives "in the philosophical sense." He asked my name, and when I said Russell, he said, "But that is man name! What is your woman name!?" I just said it was my name, and that I had to get back to my lunch.
I'm certainly a teenage boy in a lot of ways these days. My emotional responses to situations are different, and I half don't know what to do with them. I am more likely to get "pissed off", which is to say likely at all. At the same time, I realize that I'm being angry and short[-tempered], and usually calm or apologize myself out of it pretty well. Plus, I'm finally figuring out what I want to do when I grow up. For the past few months I've been leaning toward faggy high school English teacher, though as of last night, I think it will have to coincide or even be superseded by bartender. I had a realization that I should really stop worrying about having a respectable career that helps the future of tomorrow when all I want to do is stay out late and make drinks.
If anyone reading this is in the mood for a counselor, trans-related or not, I just want to give another resounding shout out to Jordan Junechul Shin. She is hilarious and pure awesome.
5 comments:
YAY NEW PEGASISSY ALBUM!
This entry makes me imagine Mark from The Room singing "Crying" and then getting pissed off and threatening to push me off a building.
Wow, I'm on a list. I like the sparkles.
I also like how you are listed under three different names (two of them the same) as contributor to your blog. It's a fun playing with identity thing.
I'm assuming you've seen "Naked Civil Servant" and read "Querelle" by Jean Genet, but if you haven't, for god's sake, man, get on it!
PS word verification: "Preouch"
The "diff names" thing is for my various email addresses (so I can be logged into my work email and still be blogging away, since Google owns blogspot and therefore the world.)
I've been meaning to see and read both. I have a not so small crush on Quentin Crisp.
Naked Civil Servant is available to stream online from Netflix!
Post a Comment